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Tofu Chocolate Ice Cream

Matty B: “They’re renaming the Rose Garden.” (arena where the Portland Trail Blazers play)

Me: “What? Why? What’s the new name?”

Matty B: “Now it’s called the Moda Center. It’s named after Moda Health. Supposedly they paid 4 million for the name change.”

Me: “That’s stupid. I hate that name. It should still be called the Rose Garden!”

Matty B: “Hey, if someone offered me 4 million dollars to change J Man’s name to Moda, I’d do it!”

And the true colors come out…

There are some names that shouldn’t be tampered with. Ice cream is a perfect example.


I typically like to name my recipes after ingredients that are actually in the recipe. This recipe, however, has no cream. Deceitful.


But if I name it with a title that’s indicative of the ingredients, I’m calling this “Chocolate Tofu”. Any takers?


I didn’t think so. If you’ve got a conscience, call this recipe “Chocolate Delight” or “Delicious Frozen Chocolate”. You won’t be lying.

But whatever you do, don’t call it the Moda Center…

Tofu Chocolate Ice Cream


1 package (12 oz) silken tofu
1 package dark chocolate chips
1 cup almond milk


Melt chocolate chips over a double boiler. Let cool slightly. Combine all ingredients in a blender or food processor until smooth. Chill until ready to use.

Process in an ice cream maker per your model’s instructions. Mine is a cuisinart and took about 20 minutes for soft serve. Freeze if you want a harder consistency.


3 responses »

  1. nummmnummm…I want some!

  2. Screenshot saved. Ice cream is happening the second I get home from my work trip!


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