I don’t miss meat.
And that’s 99% true.
I had never eaten a “real” hot dog until I was about 22, and I threw it up that night anyway, so beef hot dogs hold no candle to my Big Franks.
Red meat doesn’t really appeal to me. The hamburgers I’ve eaten in my time have been gray and gristly. And while I’ve had a filet mignon a time or two, I never really saw what the big deal was. I used to get nose bleeds a lot as a child, and that faint taste of blood always reminds me of steak. Gross. Did I just over share? Yes, yes I did. But that’s real life folks. Meat tastes like blood.
I’ve never had pork. The end.
I did go through a tuna fish craving when I was pregnant with J Man, but it really does smell (and look) like cat food, and that craving is over. Now I’m craving chocolate, but that’s normal life. (and no, mom, I’m NOT pregnant. I’m not a baby making machine, you know…)
So, that 1% of me that misses meat? It’s the chicken burrito from the taco truck down the road from my school. I mentioned here that I do enjoy the vegan burrito, but it’s just not the same. I don’t know what that sweet little taco man does to his chicken, but it’s flavorful and tender and it makes me want to swoon. Whenever we order from the taco truck, Glenda looks at me, just tempting me to share a chicken burrito with her. I die a little bit inside each time.
I tried to find a solution in the form of this recipe
I’m not gonna lie. This doesn’t take anything like a chicken burrito.
But it’s good. This is just a classic seitan recipe. Where I grew up we called them gluten steaks.
I’ve always been a little intimidated by gluten steaks. It seemed complicated. It seemed like something that experienced chefs would make. It seemed like something that I would really mess up.
But this was so super easy!
Unless you’re weird, like me, you probably don’t have these ingredients in your kitchen. You might need a trip to the store. But once you’ve got a bag of vital wheat gluten, you’re set!
You could eat these plain. I did. You could chop them up and throw them in a salad. I did. Or, you could thinly slice them, sauté the pieces in olive oil and taco seasoning and call them fajitas. I did.
Marty B was skeptical. He’s a big fan of Trader Joe’s chicken less strips. He’s occasionally a good sport (as long as we’re not playing monopoly…oh wait, that’s me…) and this happened to be one of those moments, so he tried my seitan.
He liked it! It’s no gristly hamburger, but it’ll do…