Matty B won’t eat mushrooms.
If you’ve been reading Versatile Vegan for any amount of time, you aren’t surprised by this statement. He actually refers to them as the “devil’s food.” Something about anything that grows off of dead things must be from the devil. I don’t really think that the person who binges on soda stream concentrate (high fructose corn syrup anyone?) has any room to talk about the devil, but whatever.
We were up at the cabin a few weeks ago and Matty B disappeared for 20 minutes. When he returned, he came bearing these beauties. Morel mushrooms!
Have you seen morels in the wild? They look like pine cones, but once you see what they look like, they just pop out at you.
And they were everywhere! Also, baseball mitts are good for many uses. So we went on a mushroom hunt and had probably two pounds (is that right, Matty B?) when I saw this most glorious sight.
Look at this puppy! He’s huge! I literally carried him around for 30 minutes because I loved him so much. Also, I was absolutely unwilling to share with anyone who “accidentally” got the giant mixed up in his bag/baseball mitt.
Before you eat wild morels, you’re supposed to soak them in salt water. Aunt Terrie says over night. Google says 2 hours. I was confused, so I soaked mine for 4 hours and called it good.
Then I sautéed them in butter with garlic, salt and pepper. Will you judge me if I tell you I ate 1.5 lbs of mushrooms by myself?
They’re so good. I mean, so. Good. If you haven’t had a morel before, the best adjective I can think of to describe the flavor is meaty. Keep in mind, however, that I haven’t had meat since October 5, 2011 when I had a chicken burrito from the taco truck with my friend Glenda, so I might not be the best judge of meaty.
Other than straight out of the frying pan with a fork, my favorite way to eat these mushrooms was over scrambled eggs. Decadent.
If mushrooms truly come from the devil, then call me a sinner.